Switching Things Up

So, I have now changed the name of my Blog.  It was formerly "the Life & Times of a 27 year old Dabbler".  But I have realized the Dabbler in me is becoming less and less.  I have found my purpose in life! Hopefully this means the I will no longer be known as the one who just takes her time, still figuring things out, being the "baby of the family".  I will probably still touch on how I got to where I am today, but I do not want to dwell on the past.  I want to move forward in life and embrace every moment of it!

I want to now be the woman who made something wonderful out of life! She didn't just go get a job because its the thing to do.  I want to be someone who is making a difference in lives of women everywhere and using my personal sales business to do it!  It's kinda funny when I heard our slogan is "Enriching Women's Lives", because I didn't fully understand what that meant at the time.  But, I get it now.  It means giving them confidence, helping self-esteem grow in women everywhere! Whether it's a shade of lipstick, helping find the right skin care, or giving a woman an oppurtunity that no one else would...that is all enriching lives of women!  This is my "why" and my drive to get out of bed every day and get on the phone, share a smile and a business card with someone new, to help support my team and keep them motivated!

Being a Princess is fun...after all, doesn't every little girl go through a "princess phase"? I want to help all of us to remember what that felt like, that importance to others.  It means to hold your head high and demand respect from yourself and others.  I beleive if you treat others with Golden Rule Service and a Go-Give Spirit, and you will get that in return. It's like Pay It Forward...Do unto others as you would like done unto you...They all work together to make this world a prettier place to live in. As women, we tend to put ourselves on the back-burner and put everyone else's needs first.  We need to remember to take time for ourselves, to keep ourselves in check and balance; otherwise we may lose ourself in our surroundings.  And what is that teaching the next generation of young women?  All of this is what it means to me to be a Princess.

OMG! Always in the middle of a post, Partner in Crime texts me with her Dove Chocolate quote of the day: A bubble bath can matter more than a clean kitchen.
Another Great Quote to leave you with: Love Yourself. Dare to Dream. Live on Purpose.

Pay now, Play later or Play now, Pay later???

So there are is a lot going on right now, and it's all costing a lot of money! Money, that I am working on getting by working, but do not have very much of right now because work is going slower than I would like it to. I want to do it all, but I'm afraid I can't afford it all, which means I have to pick and choose.  I do not have any $ in savings to just say ok, yeah, I can do that, and that, and that....

For starters, Chevy Boy and I want to take a vacation, which we have never done in our 3 years of being together. Well, last summer we took a 3 day trip to Reno, but that is not really a vacation. We still aren't talking about something extravagant. But a 5 day trip or so to So Cal. We want to go to Universal Studios (I've only been once for 1 day) and Disneyland (Chevy Boy has only been once when he was about 10 or so). Gotta go to Midevil Times too! Maybe Hearst Castle (everyone that has been, raves and says we gotta see it). We'd drive down, and stay somewhere nice but deffinately nothing topnotch. This would be a vacation on a budget, which is totally doable.  We keep talking about it, but other things (usually my things for work) keep pushing back our vacation.  I feel like its not fair to him to choose my career again over "us". He doesn't look at it this way, thank goodness! He is such a sweetie with a big heart that he gets now why I do what I do and what I have to do to keep my motivation going.  We were talking last night with some of the Boy's fam and they want to go too! Which would be so exciting and fun to have a group of 6 going!!! But, we are looking at going within the next 2-3 months.

Let's see, what else is going on? Day or weekend trip with my mom, aunt's, cousins, and my nanny (mom's mom) for nanny's b-day this October.  And I deffinately want to pay my own way. I do not want to lean on anyone (especially my mom because she has bailed me out enough and that's a whole nother post!) to pay for my fun. So there is about $100 for food and fun if it's just a day trip, $150-$200 if it's an over-nighter somewhere.

The girlfriends want to do a roadtrip/day trip, possibly for an upcoming Birthday Girl who deffinately deserves an extra special day. This gal is there for all of us at a drop of a hat, and always up for a good time without complaint. I also feel like she hasn't had time to "be a kid" enough throughout her life, and has had to take care of her younger siblings too often. I think sometimes she gets shafted since she is quiet and just goes with the flow and I feel deep down we should be making her birthday extra special for her to show her how much she means to us. So, here is about another $100 easy for a day trip somewhere.

Which leads me to also in October is another fun trip for work that is I know is deffinately worth going to. I know I will get the motivation and recognition I love, and the training I need to keep my business growing and in full swing. But, we are looking at at least another $300 for this. And what if none of my team members go? I know I need to go if they go. I need to lead by example. "the speed of the leader is the speed of the gang!" I get it now! But they have already  made plans before this extra job came into play, and I understand where they are coming from....either have something going on right before or right after this trip....don't want to leave kids behind for that long of a time...yeah, I get it.  And I am not going to pressure them to go. I have said my peice and I am leaving it up to them.

I feel like my career has won too many times over my personal life in the past year.  Last October I chose the career over mother-daughter time at a church retreat.  If I didn't go to Texas, Chevy Boy and I could have gone on vacation already.  Which, by the way, I am soo thankful that I did go to Texas! I know I wouldn't be shooting for the moom now with my business if I didn't go to Texas.  I am not at all blaming my business. In fact, I blame myself for waiting until now to get off my ass and move my business like I should! But we cannot go back in time and work harder in the past, so no use dwelling on that and making myself feel worse. 

I know the boss says this is all to be expected when you are moving up the ladder! Your friends and family will understand when you make it to the top and then can really afford to Play without feeling guilty. But then, when I make it directorship, I really have a whole team looking up to me that I have to be there for. So I just can't do this, or do that still. Pay now, play later they say! But I feel like the past year, I have been using company events to "pay now" and now it's time to Play with those that deserve it. This is all something internal that I need to decide what is more important to me right now.  I feel as though I owe it to everyone else (non-business people) to spend time with them now. But I have also made commitments to the career gals.  I just know whichever I decide, I will be letting some people down because I can't do it all.
I am not making any decisions now, but will jsut keep working this next week or two and see how it goes.

Fear vs Faith

There is a saying in my business that I have heard time and time again. "Fear & Faith cannot live in the same house".  The first time I heard this, it dawned on me that I had Fear "living in my house" aka in my head, and I needed Faith!!  Even though I think I heard this at a weekly success meeting for my business, it is very relateable to any and all aspects of someone's life!  A career, a relationship, a goal, being stuck in a comfort zone.

I have let Fear win too often in all of the above.  I knew what it mean the first time I heard it, and I knew I wanted Faith, but I didn't know internally how to let the Faith in.  I couldn't let go of the Fear....oh my goodness, all the "what-ifs"!!!  Now I am learning how to turn those "what-ifs" into positive goals.  I think what I have really been scared of all along is "what if I succeed?"  Then what? I can't stop, and go back. And who would want to?  Who in thier right mind would let the Faith in, and succeed at a accomplishing a goal and then say "nevermind, I don't want it".  What I am leading to is that what if the real fear is not whether or not we want something, what if it's really thinking "are we worthy of it?"  Unfortunately, I do think that is the case some of the time.  And to answer that last question, YES!! Each and every one of us is Worthy! We are worthy of a loving relationship, of a peaceful home, of a happy career, of great friends and family, etc.

It has taken me about a year to really start to kick out Fear and let Faith in. It's an internall struggle I have almost every day.  I have to make the decision that today is going to be a great day!!! I will have faith in God to keep me safe, and to provide for me what is needed to get through the day.  Therefore I will also have faith that my plan of action will work, if I work at it. Almost every day I remind myself that Fear and Faith cannot live in the same house, and today I am choosing Faith! 

I guess this relates to a quote a friend texted me today: I am successful because I know that God gives me the ingrediants for my daily bread, but He expects me to do the baking. We have to allow God to work in our lives but at the same time, we need to follow His plan for us.

Another Great quote just recieved by a Dove Chocolate: "Keep your promises to yourself and to others."  Promise outloud that every day you are going to let Faith defeat Fear.  Have Faith in yourself that you can do it and it will happen!

So I know this is kind of a bunch of rambling, and may not make sense to some, but I needed to let all that out. And I promise, it won't all be internal conflicts on this blog, but I do have quite a few so they will probably be aired here. So thanks for reading!

Self-Help Books

I started a new book about a week ago, "Women Food & God" by Geneen Roth.  I saw this author on Oprah a few weeks back talking about this book, and it resignated with me.  She talked about how people, but mainly women, will turn to food for comfort.  We can use food as a short-term "problem-solver" when the going gets tough. I thought, well, since I am trying to really go forth in changing old habits and find my "meaning in life", and I like to read, I will give this book a try.


Roth mentioned that after reading this book, if used correctly, one will never diet again.  I thought to myself, what could it hurt? Maybe I should give this book a try.  So, as I mentioned, I started reading this book about a week ago, and I am now about 1/4 of the way through. OMG!!  There are other women out there like me!  I have never read a "self-help book" or thought much of them. I didn't even think of this book in that category until now. This book relates to emotional eating, and discusses how food and God (or whatever spiritual beleifs you may have) go hand in hand. I am not sure how much I want to divulge into my private thoughts for anyone reading this, but here is your warning.  If I start, it may get ugly.  If you feel the same and really understand a place like mine or similar, then, please feel free to comment. Otherwise, I do not ask for your pity. If you have never dealt with food relating to emotion, then you are lucky and high-five to you!

I like food, and always have. I have also been up and down in my weight since I satarted getting rounder around the age of 8. I have tried a few different diets that have been short-lived fixes to my unhappiness with my body. After my last diet and gaining all my lost weight back over the last 3 years, I swore I would never diet again. I have realized that in order for something to last, you have to stick with it. There is no such thing as a long term fix with a short term change. Some may wonder why I just don't join a gym then, and lose weight in a healthy way. I have joined gyms, attended aerobics classes, done a little weight training, spent hours on a treadmill, etc. I do not like it and it does not make me feel good. The only thing that I think of when at the gym, or when thinking about a gym, is that I am only there to make myself thinner. It is for the sole purpose to appear healthy and trim.I know this is not the case for most, but just sharing my personal opinion and thoughts for myself. I'll leave my feelings toward a gym at that for now.

We got a First Timer!!

So, I have always wanted to be a writer. In high school, I assumed being a co-editor of my Senior Yearbook meant I totally had an "in" as a future journalist for Mtv. I have kept journals, and even started writing a book in my teen years (It was pretty lame, i'll spare you details).  I like to share my opinions. I wear my heart on my sleeve and like to share my feelings with others (mainly because my face tells it all, whatever the mood may be).

I have also always been a "dabbler". I am 27 years old, and have yet to "graduate" from the local junior college. I am a certified dental assistant, but after 3 years in that glamourous biz in my early 20's, I decided that wasn't the life I wanted "forever" but am glad I do have it to fall back on (which I pray never happens).

About 2 years ago, I started a little personal sales business, which I now happen to love! I beleive this is something I am great at, and it gives me wonderful self-confidence and makes me feel beautiful all at the same time, which has not been the case about 50% of my life (I'm a great faker). I will be mentioning this endevour in my blog from time to time, but I will not be using my blog "to sell myself"...as in my business, not my body or soul. haha!

This blog is more for me to find myself than to enlighten others. I'll be digging up some personal stuff to help me identify myself now.  I will not hold anyone accountable for my actions except myself. But maybe this will help others as it helps me.  I guess that would be my 1 wish for this blog: that maybe, just maybe, there are others out there that can relate to me and let them know they are not alone.  Who knows, maybe I'll get a book deal someday based on my writings, and my journalist dream will come true...minus the whole "Mtv portion".  If Lauren Conrad can do it, anyone can!